Family Ever since I can remember my dad has engraved the thought that family will be willing to help you no matter what, and that family should always come first because friends may come and go, but the people who will always be there is your family. All the way through elementary and middle school I had just about the same friends, sure a couple moved away or went to different schools but they were never really close. I have always adored and loved my brothers and sisters dearly, but I never thought that they were my best friends, until i started high school. When we started high school my friend and I had hung out all summer, almost everyday we spent together. She was my best friend since fourth grade, and I was happy being best friends. Then we started different extra-curricular activities and started to see less and less of each other, sure I had other friends just none that I could feel comfortable dropping by. So, I lazed about my house for most of the year, never really realizing that my sister was always home to entertain me, and my brother was also home most of the time. That's when we really started to cement together. I have never felt that my siblings and I were unhappy around each other, or not close, but that year was the true year that I loved to spend almost every waking second with them. I realized that my dads preaching was completely true. My siblings were always ready to spend time with me, they never put sports or others first, I learned a valuable lesson from them. Family comes first no matter the situation, and from freshman year on I have done my complete best to honor them as they honored me when my best friend had other things going for her. I will always make sure that I tend to the wants or needs of my siblings before anyone else, just as they would for me. -Jennah Salbato
My Opinion Has Changed About… Abortion is a subject that many people try to avoid talking about because of how touchy it is. For some, they feel that it is a cruel thing to do, to take life that has never had the chance to live. For others it may be an action to take so that the baby will not have to go through a troubled life. It is hard for me to pick a side and stick to it, because both sides have miraculous arguments to them. Although it may be hard to choose, I can confidently say that my opinion has changed. I used to be one of the people that thought of abortion was a terrible and selfish act, but now I can see there is more to it than just not wanting the baby. If a woman was raped and became pregnant, then that pregnancy and that baby would be a constant reminder to a highly negative event in that woman’s life, and who knows what depression could do. The way I used to see it, was that abortion was wrong under any circumstances and anyone that did it was a terrible person. Now, I think that in some cases it may be the best thing to do. Some say that if you can’t support it, or you don’t want it then put it up for adoption, but what they don’t know is how hard it would be to do that. No matter what I think that it is that person’s personal decision and that everyone should just back off and not be so judgmental.Kaylin Nelson Independence When I was but five years old, news came to me that my Super Man had passed away. His fierce independence and soothing baritone voice ring in my ears to this day. When I was but five years old, I said goodbye to Donald McNamara, known lawyer, beloved father and grandfather. After the devastating blow to my innocence came into a sensible view, I began to stray from the sandbox and investigate the world of literature. I had decided that I could be just as great a man, even if I were a girl with cooties. My world had shifted, and I had seen that the man I once loved was even more influential than he had seemed on the court. My grandfather was a man of great will; a will so strong I know my father could sense it from a thousand miles from home. My grandfather cared for his family the way one cares for a beautiful garden. He spent hours under an unforgiving lamp light, looking up to the heavens for a solution to break through the mountain of papers facing him daily. His natural element was to be controlled at all times, feeding his garden with soul nutrients brought forth through a hard day’s work. There were extras of course, as he was still a human, but I am told that his devotion to care left him with no excuse to ever shed his suit and tie. He was a man of great will. Intimidation had no meaning to him, though was often found in the eyes of any man who crossed him, including my father. He devoted his life to doing the absolute best, and because of that, there was no room for error, however rooms large enough to house a family of six without any discomfort. He was a man of great will, and so was I. Or so I thought. Reflection of my hero left me with a new born streak of feminism, equal rights, and justice. I also found myself to be asking for respect and responsibility. At but five years old, I knew this was a leap, but they say those who ask shall receive, and that’s just what happened. Education began to consume me; every ounce of my being was derivative of the vitamins that only leather bound pages may provide. I was on my way to a life I had only dreamed of. As my mind began to grow and further investigate issues I could not consciously comprehend, education began to lose its shine. My fellow peers, none of whom seemed to understand my endless hunger for equations and riddles, began pairing off. Best friends formed and games began a trend on the playground. I was left where I had started; in the sandbox, only this time, I was alone. I began to take my time walking home each day, as I observed the neighborhood I could describe in my sleep. Each day something new and seemingly insignificant would arrive; a new car, a friend saying their goodbyes, a dog wandering helplessly up and down the wide road. These were all evidence of life. What I had were the books in my hand. Helping friends to this day, books are of high priority to me, as is education and independence, but when I was but five years old, thinking I knew the world, I hadn’t even realized my life was being written before me. I still wish to remain a strong and independent woman, but I will never again bind myself to ink and fragile paper.
Marina Lynn Cursing When I was small I used to hate it when people swore in any kind of way. I would hit my parents whenever they said harmless words like crap, or hell. Cursing was rude, in bad taste, and no one around you really wanted to hear it. Now, however, I curse like a dam sailor! It’s okay in my mind, now! It’s a great comic relief and 95% of all people swear on a regular basis anyway. I can’t decide if it’s just a bad habit, or if it’s a part of today’s society. Or both? Tyler Sprague
Longboarding As a sixth grade student I dreadfully observed as some of my best friends start getting into skating. When I was that age I had no desire to even attempt it. I would tell them I am already a tremendous snowboarder. Two years later my friend came up to me and showed me his new long board. Before I refused to ride the 30 inch slab of bamboo, he informed me that it was just summer snowboarding. I saw him do a hill, saw him carving and weaving, from then on I knew I had to at least give this a shot. Two weeks later I bought my own board, I had a love affair going on with this sport. That original Arbor board lasted four phenomenal years, and would still work if assembled. Now I almost prefer long boarding to snowboarding. On a snowboard if you fall at high speed you fall into snow. Maybe get banged up a bit but generally your ok. On a long board, you fall into asphalt and it is not nearly as forgiving. This adds a little more adrenaline to the picture. Despite my original dislike for it skating the sport has become the key component to my life.
Jackson Bailey
Music
When I was younger I never saw the mass appeal behind music of any kind. To me, if it wasn’t classical music, it was just a great din of noises and people pointlessly talking into a microphone overdramatizing things I could care less about. Pop culture in general was completely foreign to me, other than I knew that it existed. Music and sports especially I thought, would really benefit mankind should the absence thereof them occur. I continued to uphold and defend this opinion, until my interests shifted from pursuing knowledge to achieving social accomplishments in middle school. In order to conform with the rest of my peers, I realized I needed to learn the foundational pillars of society, music being the easiest one I thought could master first. At first I remained hesitant and indifferent to the upbeat sounds of popular music I exposed myself to. But more and more I began to like the way it sounded. Later, in high school, I started to appreciate the lyrics and melodies music genres have as I finally made the connection between music, people, and myself. Today, not only do I like listening to music, but I also like to play it as well, creating my own beats and rhymes on a guitar. I don’t think this current opinion will ever change again.
Ian Evans
Split Houses
When i was three my parents got a divorce. Ever sense then I have been going back and forth between houses. I always thought it would be rude to pick one house to live at and only visit the other house. As i got older i realized how hard it was for me to be switching houses. I was leaving things at the other house that i needed at that moment and couldn't get because it was across town. I knew that i couldn't stand moving my stuff over between houses and decided to move in with my mom. At first i thought that i was being rude and choosing between my parents. Now i understand that it was something i needed for me. One room with all my things that i could leave there and call it my room. I still visit my dad as often as i should see him but live at my moms house to make things easier for me. "The key to change, is to let go of fear." -Rosanne Cash
Michelle Lamb
“Perfection” From a young age, my father has held high expectations for my sisters and I. He has always wanted us to be the best that we can possibly be. From academics to appearance, you must present yourself in a positive way in order to earn respect from those around you. For many years I thought the only thing to do was strive for perfection, and falling short of my goals was just not good enough. It was embarrassing to me not to feel perfect. But by the time I was in 5th grade, I remember an embarrassing moment that changed my way of thinking. I was chosen as the "student of the week" from my classroom and my assignment was to do a presentation about myself. I spent an entire week on that presentation. By the time I was done presenting my poster with 50 pictures of myself cheerleading, on vacation, at my house, etc.; everyone in the classroom was so bored I thought they all were asleep. When it was time for questioning, a girl in my class innocently asked, "Well why do you try to do so much stuff? Don't you ever just want to be normal?" At that point I felt like everything on that poster was a fake image of me. I threw the poster away and soon realized all of the new things I wanted to experience. I wanted to experience all of the things that represented imperfection to me. From that moment on I changed my mind about striving for perfection, and started searching for the imperfections in life. There is something beautiful about imperfection. Life's true experiences are usually found in the most imperfect moments.
-Raquel LaBriola Abortion Abortion is a gigantic issue in America today. When I was growing up from a religious stand point, it was a sin to have an abortion it’s also in the bible and I thought it was a really big deal. I was disgusted with the idea of murdering a baby. I believed that the fetus had a voice in the decision as much as the mother and father did. I also believe that if a young teenage girl became pregnant then she was meant to have a baby. Life will happen when it’s meant to happen. Now that I’m in high school and have seen some of my peers expecting I had a whole new insight on abortion. Some of these girls were involved with sports. As an athlete I can’t imagine making the choice to keep what was inside of you or not. At the same time if you’re old enough to be making those actions then you are old enough to be dealing with the consequences that come with it, having a baby. In the end the mother is going to try her hardest to make the best life for her baby, abortion may be her only selection.
-Alex Peirano
MY Future
As I think more and more about what I'm going to do for the rest of my life, many ideas come up. To be honest i actually have picked what I want to do. There are two things and each of them have there own purpose to why I chose them, and why I want to do both, but will take time, and the right steps. Now my first choice has always been to become a pilot in the Air force. As I started or learned and trained I first wanted to study mechanics to get to know the plane and everything else there is to know. Then as as finished that study I would move on to the study of intelligence, and heavy machinery use, to then future my studies and be able to do all three jobs before becoming a pilot. Then after I graduate from the Air Force Academy for four years I will then train to become a pilot and be the best know pilot know to America and maybe the whole world.
As for my second choice of college I have also had the dream to become a Visual Effects and Graphic Design pro, well I mean like create characters and be a game creator, do all the visual effects and movement and so on.
I have changed my opinion many times about these to life careers because at the start of when I first thought so much about these two careers I never thought I had the smarts to become a pilot or the brains and creativity to do visual effects and graphic design. I always had that negative proposition to which I couldn't do those things. That has changed now, I know now that I am smart enough to do both careers and I know that nothing can stand in my way of me changing my opinion about because of what others think or what negative things might effect that.-Max Miller Music Music has always been a huge, and important part in my life. Growing up I always listened to one genre, and that genre was Heavy Metal. I never really liked anything other than that type of music until I suddenly became jaded with my favorite type of music. I never had respect for Hip Hop, or Techno, or any other type of music outside of Metal, but when my curiosity got the best of me I soon found myself dabbling into the world of unexplored music. Suddenly I was enjoying Hip Hop acts such as Wu Tang Clan, N.W.A., and Public Enemy, music groups I would never in a million years imagine myself listening to. Looking back on myself 3 years ago it’s amazing to see how narrow minded I was when it came to music. All music is beautiful in it’s own respective way, whether if it’s the quirky, and interesting melodies of Jazz music, or the heart wrenching guitar solos of the Blues, every genre has something tremendously pleasing to deliver from it’s sonic pallet into your ear. Changing my opinion on music has definitely opened my mind into a new world of tolerance, and acceptance. Rory Rummings Your Parents Know Best! That Doesn't Mean You Should ListenThrough out my life I've always been told what not to do, or where I shouldn't be. I always thought that simply listening for the answer is just too easy! Experiencing the problems in life yourself usually leads to a more difficult path, but in the long run you learn your lesson. When I was about seven my dad found a new girlfriend, eventually we ended up moving to her house in Aurora. At first I hated being there, but as time passed the place grew on me like vines infesting a backyard. I met a lot of new people, and found plenty of new ways to get into trouble.My dad noticed that I was starting to enter that "crazy velosaraptor teenager faze" as he likes to call it. So one day after school he sat me down and made me promise that i wouldn't be sneaking out of the house past curfew. I was only thirteen at the time, and we didn't live in the best part of town. So I can understand why he was a little worried, to say the least! One summer night my friends and I had the amazing idea to go crash this kids party. At about three in the morning we were walking down the street on our way home when four patrol cars, with their sirens blaring pulled up behind us.Now, my dad's a very understanding person but no one likes getting woken up at 3:30 by a bunch of mad police and drunken teenagers. The only thing that really pissed him off was that he had repeatedly warned me, even begged me not to sneak out of the house! In the end I figured out for myself that the consequences usually aren't worth the risks. I could have just listened to my dad’s advice, but in the end I probably wouldn’t have understood why what I was doing was so wrong.Zane Mas
Just because you've been told to love them...(Family=extended family) Over the last couple of years a series of events happened that would alter the course of my life forever. However, before I get into that I'll say a couple of things first, the first thing I would like to bring up is family, the people that are there for you even when no one else is.For the most part I do love and will always cherish most of my family. Before you read what is to follow please remember we're all humans. From what I said before, family is something to be cherished and never be forgotten. Then you do somethings and you'll never look at the same people the same way ever again. My changed opinion was that all the previous statements are true( family, love, etc), or to be more clear, trust and love and all that are nice but there are always two sides to every picture and that you shouldn't love family for the sake of it. My prime example of it would be my extended living period with family out on the east coast. Before I lived with them I would say that I loved them all to death(them being my Aunt and Uncle). Living with them and having the differences we had, things were bound to get out of hand. Long story short is, I absolutely hate their entire family sans my uncle. Just because everyone is told to love their family doesn't mean you have to... -Kyle Erickson Thinking With My Heart and My Head
When I was younger, I used to dream of going far away for college. I wanted to live that glamorously independant life, where I proved to everyone that I could do it all on my own. In my mind, I was able to envision myself strutting around some foreign campus without a care in the world. More recently, all I've been able to envision is how much I'll miss my family and how many student loans would constantly be clogging my subconscious. As fun as that adventure would be, and how much I would grow as a person, I've realized that smarter decisions could make my sparkling start as an adult so much smoother. It would be wiser to find somewhere I could attend without having to take out many student loans. In addition, I began to think that I would be missing many of my neices and nephews school programs, and it would be simply awful if my family needed anything or if someone got sick and I was hundreds of miles away, useless. Going away for college would be an unforgettable journey. It would accompany countless life lessons that I'm sure I would carry with me through life. However, college itself will be an adventure, no matter where I go. I can no longer think with just my head, about what I want, I must also think with my heart, about what I know will be best. So, what was once seemingly set in stone, is now a mere possibility looming in the not too distant future.
-Allison Smith
Music Speaks “Music is life” is what teenagers would say now-a-days. But when I look back at my younger days, I was so strong about the type of music I liked. I remember how I had a debate with my auntie about what genre of music was the best. Of course, I was defending that the music played on KS107.5 was the best. She was on the side that variety of music was better than the music played on the radio. We went back and forth for awhile actually. But it wasn’t until I was in seventh or eighth grade year that I understood variety is better. Because as you grow older and start to understand the words in the song, you start to understand that maybe those different genres that you don’t normally listen to will sing your life story better than what the “popular” music will. Till this day I’m still trying to discover the music that tells my story. -Sierra Trejo My future!
Throughout my life, there have been many things that I have changed my opinion on over time. One of the more drastic opinion changes was the decision to go to college or not. In my early teens, I had the solid opinion that college was just for really smart, wealthy people and would be a waist of time and money for me. I was firm in the decision that I was not going to college because I thought that I could do perfectly fine without it. I believe that I had this opinion because of my lack of ambition and motivation. It wasn’t until freshmen year that I started to learn that college was really a guarantee to being successful. Success was something I began to want. Considering that it is only three years later, I believe that I have grown up a lot and the course for my life has changed very significantly since I have started caring about my future, well-being, and moral standards. I am now solid on my decision to go to college and will do anything in my power to make sure I do. I have learned to no longer make excuses weather it be fanatical instability or the lack of family support. Thanks to this opinion change, I look forward to a bright and beautiful future for myself. -Alysha Torrez Opinion Change Abortion is a subject that many view as unthinkable; I have always felt that no matter what, that abortion should never take place under any occurrence. When looked at there are always extenuating circumstances to abortion, like rape, or incest you cannot ask someone who has gone through that traumatic of an experience to keep the child. I used to think that it didn’t matter that the fetus, or child did not ask to be brought into this world; so what gives someone the right to bequeath him or her before it has a chance to experience life. There are many alternatives to abortion, which myriad amounts do not take into consideration before jumping straight into abortion. Adoption is one that I think every mother should consider before aborting their child. They may not want to carry a child with them that was conceived threw such terrible circumstances, but will they be able to live with themselves after terminating their unborn child. Abortion should not be used just because of a drunken night out; and now the parents do not the responsibility, at least carry the baby those short nine months and then give it up. Death is the highest price to pay for your crimes, but what crime did the unborn child commit to deserve this course of action. Abortion should be against the law; unless there are extenuating circumstances, and anyone who performs the operation should be punished severely. Abortion should not be taken lightly, but if the baby was conceived threw rape, or insist it should be allowed. Justin
COMFORMIST
I use to beleive in conforming into what society wants you to be and never acting apon your own free will. If you conform into your "comfort zone" then you are most likely not going to get hurt or experience stress. Also when in your "comfort zone" you tend not to abolish any independent thoughts and actions that one might have. So many extraordinary accoplishments would not of been succeded if everyone were to conform to society. I can relate to being a conformist by never doing anything spontanious and just doing everything "right". Then later in life I started branching out and if I did not do this then I would of never snuck out and meet up with these girls and had a great night star-gazing. As well as all most everything is, too much can be bad and being out of your comfort zone way to far can lead to very bad things. You can be mischievous a bit with in limits. So I would rather get a slap on the wrest then get no slap at all. This is just a small form of punishment and anything more would be over the limit.
-Leandro Lara
Growing Up
When I was little I always had big dreams about what i wanted to be when I grew up. Mine was always a firefighter, but now that I'm grown up I have no clue what I want to be. My opinion on careers has changed so much within a couple years its unbelieveable. When i was little it didn't matter much to me that its what I'm going to be doing for the rest of my life. Now I look at careers and jobs and have to see if its what I'm good at and how far I can succeed in that field. I also look at pay and lifestyle of the job. Which brings me to having no clue still about what i want to be when i grow up. There are so many different oppurtunities out there and it just overwhelms me. So i find it funny how I have my mind set on one thing when I'm little but as soon as it comes the time of becoming an adult and choosing what i want to do with my life I just become clueless.
Aaron Rubbelke
A Shift in Perspective: Religion
In my youth, up until I was about 13, I was a very adamant Christian. I read my Bible and was in church every Sunday. I also attended a local youth group with a good friend of mine on Wednesday nights. I knew the Scriptures well, and felt very close to God. I trusted in the saving and redeeming powers of the Lord Jesus Christ, and hailed him as the leader of my life. But the old saying ran true, that "Anyone can take the helm when the seas are calm." And so it was that I happened to trust God when my life was at its most stable. Even in a few of the dark hours, I stood by my faith, and looked to the Word for guidance. I found passages to suit my needs and all was good. Then, however, I had questions. I searched for myself, and found no answers. I asked my mother, but in vain. I asked my friends, to no avail. So I asked my pastor, entrusted with the stewardship of the Faithful, and was no longer satisfied when his solutions came from the book I once swore upon. In prayer, I found God distant, and in the rough seas, the winds of change rocked my footing.
My younger brother had never found such faith. He trusted in himself, with a subtle dedication to his own gods. He did not pray as I prayed, did not worship as I worshiped, did not celebrate as I celebrated. In the same crises as I, he was content, composed. It was a dismal night at the end of an eventful day that I asked him, almost in anger, words dripping sarcasm, "Why the fuck are you so calm?" He knew that I never swore, and took the opportunity to respond level-headed, that I might calm myself and listen. He talked of an inner source of tranquility, and also of a more personal involvement with his own life. His rituals were meant to direct his life, he said, and to appeal to his gods for help, but they were also an appeal to greater powers for strength. I inquired as to his actions when such appeals fell on deaf ears, expecting the same depression and malcontent I felt towards my own deity that night. Instead, he bounced in the oposite direction, saying that it was the gods encouraging him to act on his own behalf. The idea was revolutionary to me. I know that Christians exist who are of the same mindset. I should say that I know that now, rather, as I knew none then who acted independently of what they felt was the will of God. Should His divine plan be indecipherable, no action was taken. So it was with me.
The next night the moon was full. Riley, my brother, came into the living room, where I was watching TV, at midnight. He told me to get shoes on and to follow him. We trekked for about a half mile into a secluded clearing in the woods behind our house. I tried several times to ask him where we were going at midnight, but, like a parent on a roadtrip, he told me that I'd see when we arrived. I was nervous, and a little ticked, but when we finally did reach the clearing, I noticed that we were not alone. Riley's two friends, Abigail and Seth, awaited us. The light of the moon provided more than enough light to see, but I didn't notice the large ring cut into the earth until Seth asked that Riley "take his place in the Circle." Seth had been informed that I would be coming (not that I had any idea), and began to explain that the full moon was a night of reverance in honor of the Goddess. Confusion and questions overwhelmed me, but he instructed me simply to watch. I was asked that night to never go into the finer points of the ritual, but after the Circle was "cast," Seth led Abby and Riley in a solemn prayer for guidance, perseverance, and strength. One by one, the recited, from memory, their own prayers and words of thanksgiving, in beautifully written prose. These were not ritual poems, however, they included specifics from days and weeks past; they were personal. Abigail humbly beseeched her Goddess for the safety of her brother overseas; Seth, near tears, petitioned the heavens for the health of his mother, fatally ill. Riley, ever one for simplicity, asked only, "That Roman's spirit might find rest, in his God, or another." That did it, that small statement, laid bare before the divines. Riley was a rash boy, and still is. Temperment was never one of his finer qualities, and he often spoke inconsiderately, or out of turn. Yet that night, in the presence of his gods, he cared for me. Also, I noted something quite unfamiliar to my own faith...
No Christian I'd yet encountered had been content with the eternal status of a non-Christian. We were a group eager to conver, eager to sway others to our own opinions. I wouldn't ever have requested of my God that he lead a friend to a place of peace at the doorstep of another temple. However, I observed much more compassion and understanding in Riley than in myself when he offered up a prayer to the stars for my well being, even if it should be in the House of the Lord. A change took root that night. I became less and less satisfied with God. I became more enraged at the inaction of my friends and fellow church-goers. No longer did I trust that I could sit idle while my needs were met from up on high. Then, I reached a breaking point one night in the middle of my Bible study, when the youth pastor, speaking of the Book of Revelation, said that those set apart from the Christian flock, cut off from God by mortal sin, were damned to Hell. In fury, I demanded of him to tell me what exactly set apart the unrepentant Christian from the righteous Pagan in the eyes of the Lord. As though the thought hadn't once crossed his mind, he replied, smiling, that the first was saved by the name of the Christ. To him, I replied, "That's sick," and I left.
I am well aware that the breed of Christian to which I was largely exposed was a small group, and that their interpretation of the Bible is neither well-informed, nor common. I am enlightened to the fact that they are not an acurate depection of Christianity. But it was in the shadow of their unimaginable arrogance that I saw God, and found Him an undesirable object of worship. So it came to pass that I observed my brother more often, and examined his faith with the same intensity I'd once devoted to my own. For a long time, I had nothing, and was inbetween religions. I amassed quite a large collection of facts on a great many, but was undecided on which was right for me. It was not until the tenth of January, at the beginning of this very year 2010, that I made the decision to follow my own little brother's path. I asked how to start. He told me that an initiation into Wicca takes three hundred and sixty six days, a year and a day. In that time, I was to study, and to learn, but not of his religion only. He told me to visit churches of all manor and creed, to visit synogogues and mosques, and to talk with men and women who followed every imaginable path on the road of life. He said that, if, after a year and a day of investigation and scrutiny, I still felt that his religion ought to be mine as well, he'd talk with me then. I have been at this for two hundred and thirty one days, and my opinion on religion has certainly changed. I still don't know where I shall land, but I feel that the topic is appropriate here, as I'm certainly Christian no longer.
~Roman Barth\
aka, he who refuses to write briefly
Drinking Age
Every Person has there own opinion about the drinking age in the United States. As i've gotten older my opinion has changed dramatically. When I was younger I thought the government should lessen the drinking age to 18. However, I now agree with the drinking age, do to the devastating things I've seen happen, caused from it. Someone everyday over the age of 21 dies in a car crash do to intoxication, along with underage kids as well. This tells people that even some adults don't know how to command there intake on alcohol. So why would they trust younger kids with it? Also, when you strat drinking at an early age, it can enhance the chances of becoming an alcoholic. This destroys your future and causes you to be less succesful then you have always dreamt about being. It can ruin the chances of you getting an academic or athletic scholarship for college. It is best to prevent yourself from being associated with alcohol as long as possible, until your of age and are intelligent about using it.
Ever since I can remember my dad has engraved the thought that family will be willing to help you no matter what, and that family should always come first because friends may come and go, but the people who will always be there is your family. All the way through elementary and middle school I had just about the same friends, sure a couple moved away or went to different schools but they were never really close. I have always adored and loved my brothers and sisters dearly, but I never thought that they were my best friends, until i started high school. When we started high school my friend and I had hung out all summer, almost everyday we spent together. She was my best friend since fourth grade, and I was happy being best friends. Then we started different extra-curricular activities and started to see less and less of each other, sure I had other friends just none that I could feel comfortable dropping by. So, I lazed about my house for most of the year, never really realizing that my sister was always home to entertain me, and my brother was also home most of the time. That's when we really started to cement together. I have never felt that my siblings and I were unhappy around each other, or not close, but that year was the true year that I loved to spend almost every waking second with them. I realized that my dads preaching was completely true. My siblings were always ready to spend time with me, they never put sports or others first, I learned a valuable lesson from them. Family comes first no matter the situation, and from freshman year on I have done my complete best to honor them as they honored me when my best friend had other things going for her. I will always make sure that I tend to the wants or needs of my siblings before anyone else, just as they would for me.
-Jennah Salbato
My Opinion Has Changed About…
Abortion is a subject that many people try to avoid talking about because of how touchy it is. For some, they feel that it is a cruel thing to do, to take life that has never had the chance to live. For others it may be an action to take so that the baby will not have to go through a troubled life. It is hard for me to pick a side and stick to it, because both sides have miraculous arguments to them. Although it may be hard to choose, I can confidently say that my opinion has changed. I used to be one of the people that thought of abortion was a terrible and selfish act, but now I can see there is more to it than just not wanting the baby. If a woman was raped and became pregnant, then that pregnancy and that baby would be a constant reminder to a highly negative event in that woman’s life, and who knows what depression could do. The way I used to see it, was that abortion was wrong under any circumstances and anyone that did it was a terrible person. Now, I think that in some cases it may be the best thing to do. Some say that if you can’t support it, or you don’t want it then put it up for adoption, but what they don’t know is how hard it would be to do that. No matter what I think that it is that person’s personal decision and that everyone should just back off and not be so judgmental.Kaylin Nelson Independence
When I was but five years old, news came to me that my Super Man had passed away. His fierce independence and soothing baritone voice ring in my ears to this day. When I was but five years old, I said goodbye to Donald McNamara, known lawyer, beloved father and grandfather. After the devastating blow to my innocence came into a sensible view, I began to stray from the sandbox and investigate the world of literature. I had decided that I could be just as great a man, even if I were a girl with cooties. My world had shifted, and I had seen that the man I once loved was even more influential than he had seemed on the court. My grandfather was a man of great will; a will so strong I know my father could sense it from a thousand miles from home. My grandfather cared for his family the way one cares for a beautiful garden. He spent hours under an unforgiving lamp light, looking up to the heavens for a solution to break through the mountain of papers facing him daily. His natural element was to be controlled at all times, feeding his garden with soul nutrients brought forth through a hard day’s work. There were extras of course, as he was still a human, but I am told that his devotion to care left him with no excuse to ever shed his suit and tie. He was a man of great will. Intimidation had no meaning to him, though was often found in the eyes of any man who crossed him, including my father. He devoted his life to doing the absolute best, and because of that, there was no room for error, however rooms large enough to house a family of six without any discomfort. He was a man of great will, and so was I. Or so I thought. Reflection of my hero left me with a new born streak of feminism, equal rights, and justice. I also found myself to be asking for respect and responsibility. At but five years old, I knew this was a leap, but they say those who ask shall receive, and that’s just what happened. Education began to consume me; every ounce of my being was derivative of the vitamins that only leather bound pages may provide. I was on my way to a life I had only dreamed of. As my mind began to grow and further investigate issues I could not consciously comprehend, education began to lose its shine. My fellow peers, none of whom seemed to understand my endless hunger for equations and riddles, began pairing off. Best friends formed and games began a trend on the playground. I was left where I had started; in the sandbox, only this time, I was alone. I began to take my time walking home each day, as I observed the neighborhood I could describe in my sleep. Each day something new and seemingly insignificant would arrive; a new car, a friend saying their goodbyes, a dog wandering helplessly up and down the wide road. These were all evidence of life. What I had were the books in my hand. Helping friends to this day, books are of high priority to me, as is education and independence, but when I was but five years old, thinking I knew the world, I hadn’t even realized my life was being written before me. I still wish to remain a strong and independent woman, but I will never again bind myself to ink and fragile paper.
Marina Lynn
Cursing
When I was small I used to hate it when people swore in any kind of way. I would hit my parents whenever they said harmless words like crap, or hell. Cursing was rude, in bad taste, and no one around you really wanted to hear it. Now, however, I curse like a dam sailor! It’s okay in my mind, now! It’s a great comic relief and 95% of all people swear on a regular basis anyway. I can’t decide if it’s just a bad habit, or if it’s a part of today’s society. Or both?
Tyler Sprague
Longboarding
As a sixth grade student I dreadfully observed as some of my best friends start getting into skating. When I was that age I had no desire to even attempt it. I would tell them I am already a tremendous snowboarder. Two years later my friend came up to me and showed me his new long board. Before I refused to ride the 30 inch slab of bamboo, he informed me that it was just summer snowboarding. I saw him do a hill, saw him carving and weaving, from then on I knew I had to at least give this a shot. Two weeks later I bought my own board, I had a love affair going on with this sport. That original Arbor board lasted four phenomenal years, and would still work if assembled. Now I almost prefer long boarding to snowboarding. On a snowboard if you fall at high speed you fall into snow. Maybe get banged up a bit but generally your ok. On a long board, you fall into asphalt and it is not nearly as forgiving. This adds a little more adrenaline to the picture. Despite my original dislike for it skating the sport has become the key component to my life.
Jackson Bailey
Music
When I was younger I never saw the mass appeal behind music of any kind. To me, if it wasn’t classical music, it was just a great din of noises and people pointlessly talking into a microphone overdramatizing things I could care less about. Pop culture in general was completely foreign to me, other than I knew that it existed. Music and sports especially I thought, would really benefit mankind should the absence thereof them occur. I continued to uphold and defend this opinion, until my interests shifted from pursuing knowledge to achieving social accomplishments in middle school. In order to conform with the rest of my peers, I realized I needed to learn the foundational pillars of society, music being the easiest one I thought could master first. At first I remained hesitant and indifferent to the upbeat sounds of popular music I exposed myself to. But more and more I began to like the way it sounded. Later, in high school, I started to appreciate the lyrics and melodies music genres have as I finally made the connection between music, people, and myself. Today, not only do I like listening to music, but I also like to play it as well, creating my own beats and rhymes on a guitar. I don’t think this current opinion will ever change again.
Ian Evans
Split Houses
When i was three my parents got a divorce. Ever sense then I have been going back and forth between houses. I always thought it would be rude to pick one house to live at and only visit the other house. As i got older i realized how hard it was for me to be switching houses. I was leaving things at the other house that i needed at that moment and couldn't get because it was across town. I knew that i couldn't stand moving my stuff over between houses and decided to move in with my mom. At first i thought that i was being rude and choosing between my parents. Now i understand that it was something i needed for me. One room with all my things that i could leave there and call it my room. I still visit my dad as often as i should see him but live at my moms house to make things easier for me."The key to change, is to let go of fear." -Rosanne Cash
Michelle Lamb
“Perfection”
From a young age, my father has held high expectations for my sisters and I. He has always wanted us to be the best that we can possibly be. From academics to appearance, you must present yourself in a positive way in order to earn respect from those around you. For many years I thought the only thing to do was strive for perfection, and falling short of my goals was just not good enough. It was embarrassing to me not to feel perfect. But by the time I was in 5th grade, I remember an embarrassing moment that changed my way of thinking. I was chosen as the "student of the week" from my classroom and my assignment was to do a presentation about myself. I spent an entire week on that presentation. By the time I was done presenting my poster with 50 pictures of myself cheerleading, on vacation, at my house, etc.; everyone in the classroom was so bored I thought they all were asleep. When it was time for questioning, a girl in my class innocently asked, "Well why do you try to do so much stuff? Don't you ever just want to be normal?" At that point I felt like everything on that poster was a fake image of me. I threw the poster away and soon realized all of the new things I wanted to experience. I wanted to experience all of the things that represented imperfection to me. From that moment on I changed my mind about striving for perfection, and started searching for the imperfections in life. There is something beautiful about imperfection. Life's true experiences are usually found in the most imperfect moments.
-Raquel LaBriola
Abortion
Abortion is a gigantic issue in America today. When I was growing up from a religious stand point, it was a sin to have an abortion it’s also in the bible and I thought it was a really big deal. I was disgusted with the idea of murdering a baby. I believed that the fetus had a voice in the decision as much as the mother and father did. I also believe that if a young teenage girl became pregnant then she was meant to have a baby. Life will happen when it’s meant to happen. Now that I’m in high school and have seen some of my peers expecting I had a whole new insight on abortion. Some of these girls were involved with sports. As an athlete I can’t imagine making the choice to keep what was inside of you or not. At the same time if you’re old enough to be making those actions then you are old enough to be dealing with the consequences that come with it, having a baby. In the end the mother is going to try her hardest to make the best life for her baby, abortion may be her only selection.
-Alex Peirano
MY Future
As I think more and more about what I'm going to do for the rest of my life, many ideas come up. To be honest i actually have picked what I want to do. There are two things and each of them have there own purpose to why I chose them, and why I want to do both, but will take time, and the right steps. Now my first choice has always been to become a pilot in the Air force. As I started or learned and trained I first wanted to study mechanics to get to know the plane and everything else there is to know. Then as as finished that study I would move on to the study of intelligence, and heavy machinery use, to then future my studies and be able to do all three jobs before becoming a pilot. Then after I graduate from the Air Force Academy for four years I will then train to become a pilot and be the best know pilot know to America and maybe the whole world.As for my second choice of college I have also had the dream to become a Visual Effects and Graphic Design pro, well I mean like create characters and be a game creator, do all the visual effects and movement and so on.
I have changed my opinion many times about these to life careers because at the start of when I first thought so much about these two careers I never thought I had the smarts to become a pilot or the brains and creativity to do visual effects and graphic design. I always had that negative proposition to which I couldn't do those things. That has changed now, I know now that I am smart enough to do both careers and I know that nothing can stand in my way of me changing my opinion about because of what others think or what negative things might effect that.-Max Miller
Music
Music has always been a huge, and important part in my life. Growing up I always listened to one genre, and that genre was Heavy Metal. I never really liked anything other than that type of music until I suddenly became jaded with my favorite type of music. I never had respect for Hip Hop, or Techno, or any other type of music outside of Metal, but when my curiosity got the best of me I soon found myself dabbling into the world of unexplored music. Suddenly I was enjoying Hip Hop acts such as Wu Tang Clan, N.W.A., and Public Enemy, music groups I would never in a million years imagine myself listening to. Looking back on myself 3 years ago it’s amazing to see how narrow minded I was when it came to music. All music is beautiful in it’s own respective way, whether if it’s the quirky, and interesting melodies of Jazz music, or the heart wrenching guitar solos of the Blues, every genre has something tremendously pleasing to deliver from it’s sonic pallet into your ear. Changing my opinion on music has definitely opened my mind into a new world of tolerance, and acceptance. Rory Rummings
Your Parents Know Best! That Doesn't Mean You Should ListenThrough out my life I've always been told what not to do, or where I shouldn't be. I always thought that simply listening for the answer is just too easy! Experiencing the problems in life yourself usually leads to a more difficult path, but in the long run you learn your lesson. When I was about seven my dad found a new girlfriend, eventually we ended up moving to her house in Aurora. At first I hated being there, but as time passed the place grew on me like vines infesting a backyard. I met a lot of new people, and found plenty of new ways to get into trouble.My dad noticed that I was starting to enter that "crazy velosaraptor teenager faze" as he likes to call it. So one day after school he sat me down and made me promise that i wouldn't be sneaking out of the house past curfew. I was only thirteen at the time, and we didn't live in the best part of town. So I can understand why he was a little worried, to say the least! One summer night my friends and I had the amazing idea to go crash this kids party. At about three in the morning we were walking down the street on our way home when four patrol cars, with their sirens blaring pulled up behind us.Now, my dad's a very understanding person but no one likes getting woken up at 3:30 by a bunch of mad police and drunken teenagers. The only thing that really pissed him off was that he had repeatedly warned me, even begged me not to sneak out of the house! In the end I figured out for myself that the consequences usually aren't worth the risks. I could have just listened to my dad’s advice, but in the end I probably wouldn’t have understood why what I was doing was so wrong.Zane Mas
Just because you've been told to love them...(Family=extended family) Over the last couple of years a series of events happened that would alter the course of my life forever. However, before I get into that I'll say a couple of things first, the first thing I would like to bring up is family, the people that are there for you even when no one else is.For the most part I do love and will always cherish most of my family. Before you read what is to follow please remember we're all humans. From what I said before, family is something to be cherished and never be forgotten. Then you do somethings and you'll never look at the same people the same way ever again. My changed opinion was that all the previous statements are true( family, love, etc), or to be more clear, trust and love and all that are nice but there are always two sides to every picture and that you shouldn't love family for the sake of it. My prime example of it would be my extended living period with family out on the east coast. Before I lived with them I would say that I loved them all to death(them being my Aunt and Uncle). Living with them and having the differences we had, things were bound to get out of hand. Long story short is, I absolutely hate their entire family sans my uncle. Just because everyone is told to love their family doesn't mean you have to... -Kyle Erickson
Thinking With My Heart and My Head
When I was younger, I used to dream of going far away for college. I wanted to live that glamorously independant life, where I proved to everyone that I could do it all on my own. In my mind, I was able to envision myself strutting around some foreign campus without a care in the world. More recently, all I've been able to envision is how much I'll miss my family and how many student loans would constantly be clogging my subconscious. As fun as that adventure would be, and how much I would grow as a person, I've realized that smarter decisions could make my sparkling start as an adult so much smoother. It would be wiser to find somewhere I could attend without having to take out many student loans. In addition, I began to think that I would be missing many of my neices and nephews school programs, and it would be simply awful if my family needed anything or if someone got sick and I was hundreds of miles away, useless. Going away for college would be an unforgettable journey. It would accompany countless life lessons that I'm sure I would carry with me through life. However, college itself will be an adventure, no matter where I go. I can no longer think with just my head, about what I want, I must also think with my heart, about what I know will be best. So, what was once seemingly set in stone, is now a mere possibility looming in the not too distant future.
-Allison Smith
Music Speaks
“Music is life” is what teenagers would say now-a-days. But when I look back at my younger days, I was so strong about the type of music I liked. I remember how I had a debate with my auntie about what genre of music was the best. Of course, I was defending that the music played on KS107.5 was the best. She was on the side that variety of music was better than the music played on the radio. We went back and forth for awhile actually. But it wasn’t until I was in seventh or eighth grade year that I understood variety is better. Because as you grow older and start to understand the words in the song, you start to understand that maybe those different genres that you don’t normally listen to will sing your life story better than what the “popular” music will. Till this day I’m still trying to discover the music that tells my story. -Sierra Trejo
My future!
Throughout my life, there have been many things that I have changed my opinion on over time. One of the more drastic opinion changes was the decision to go to college or not. In my early teens, I had the solid opinion that college was just for really smart, wealthy people and would be a waist of time and money for me. I was firm in the decision that I was not going to college because I thought that I could do perfectly fine without it. I believe that I had this opinion because of my lack of ambition and motivation. It wasn’t until freshmen year that I started to learn that college was really a guarantee to being successful. Success was something I began to want. Considering that it is only three years later, I believe that I have grown up a lot and the course for my life has changed very significantly since I have started caring about my future, well-being, and moral standards. I am now solid on my decision to go to college and will do anything in my power to make sure I do. I have learned to no longer make excuses weather it be fanatical instability or the lack of family support. Thanks to this opinion change, I look forward to a bright and beautiful future for myself.
-Alysha Torrez
Opinion Change
Abortion is a subject that many view as unthinkable; I have always felt that no matter what, that abortion should never take place under any occurrence. When looked at there are always extenuating circumstances to abortion, like rape, or incest you cannot ask someone who has gone through that traumatic of an experience to keep the child. I used to think that it didn’t matter that the fetus, or child did not ask to be brought into this world; so what gives someone the right to bequeath him or her before it has a chance to experience life. There are many alternatives to abortion, which myriad amounts do not take into consideration before jumping straight into abortion. Adoption is one that I think every mother should consider before aborting their child. They may not want to carry a child with them that was conceived threw such terrible circumstances, but will they be able to live with themselves after terminating their unborn child. Abortion should not be used just because of a drunken night out; and now the parents do not the responsibility, at least carry the baby those short nine months and then give it up. Death is the highest price to pay for your crimes, but what crime did the unborn child commit to deserve this course of action. Abortion should be against the law; unless there are extenuating circumstances, and anyone who performs the operation should be punished severely. Abortion should not be taken lightly, but if the baby was conceived threw rape, or insist it should be allowed.
Justin
COMFORMIST
I use to beleive in conforming into what society wants you to be and never acting apon your own free will. If you conform into your "comfort zone" then you are most likely not going to get hurt or experience stress. Also when in your "comfort zone" you tend not to abolish any independent thoughts and actions that one might have. So many extraordinary accoplishments would not of been succeded if everyone were to conform to society. I can relate to being a conformist by never doing anything spontanious and just doing everything "right". Then later in life I started branching out and if I did not do this then I would of never snuck out and meet up with these girls and had a great night star-gazing. As well as all most everything is, too much can be bad and being out of your comfort zone way to far can lead to very bad things. You can be mischievous a bit with in limits. So I would rather get a slap on the wrest then get no slap at all. This is just a small form of punishment and anything more would be over the limit.
-Leandro Lara
Growing Up
When I was little I always had big dreams about what i wanted to be when I grew up. Mine was always a firefighter, but now that I'm grown up I have no clue what I want to be. My opinion on careers has changed so much within a couple years its unbelieveable. When i was little it didn't matter much to me that its what I'm going to be doing for the rest of my life. Now I look at careers and jobs and have to see if its what I'm good at and how far I can succeed in that field. I also look at pay and lifestyle of the job. Which brings me to having no clue still about what i want to be when i grow up. There are so many different oppurtunities out there and it just overwhelms me. So i find it funny how I have my mind set on one thing when I'm little but as soon as it comes the time of becoming an adult and choosing what i want to do with my life I just become clueless.
Aaron Rubbelke
A Shift in Perspective: Religion
In my youth, up until I was about 13, I was a very adamant Christian. I read my Bible and was in church every Sunday. I also attended a local youth group with a good friend of mine on Wednesday nights. I knew the Scriptures well, and felt very close to God. I trusted in the saving and redeeming powers of the Lord Jesus Christ, and hailed him as the leader of my life. But the old saying ran true, that "Anyone can take the helm when the seas are calm." And so it was that I happened to trust God when my life was at its most stable. Even in a few of the dark hours, I stood by my faith, and looked to the Word for guidance. I found passages to suit my needs and all was good. Then, however, I had questions. I searched for myself, and found no answers. I asked my mother, but in vain. I asked my friends, to no avail. So I asked my pastor, entrusted with the stewardship of the Faithful, and was no longer satisfied when his solutions came from the book I once swore upon. In prayer, I found God distant, and in the rough seas, the winds of change rocked my footing.
My younger brother had never found such faith. He trusted in himself, with a subtle dedication to his own gods. He did not pray as I prayed, did not worship as I worshiped, did not celebrate as I celebrated. In the same crises as I, he was content, composed. It was a dismal night at the end of an eventful day that I asked him, almost in anger, words dripping sarcasm, "Why the fuck are you so calm?" He knew that I never swore, and took the opportunity to respond level-headed, that I might calm myself and listen. He talked of an inner source of tranquility, and also of a more personal involvement with his own life. His rituals were meant to direct his life, he said, and to appeal to his gods for help, but they were also an appeal to greater powers for strength. I inquired as to his actions when such appeals fell on deaf ears, expecting the same depression and malcontent I felt towards my own deity that night. Instead, he bounced in the oposite direction, saying that it was the gods encouraging him to act on his own behalf. The idea was revolutionary to me. I know that Christians exist who are of the same mindset. I should say that I know that now, rather, as I knew none then who acted independently of what they felt was the will of God. Should His divine plan be indecipherable, no action was taken. So it was with me.
The next night the moon was full. Riley, my brother, came into the living room, where I was watching TV, at midnight. He told me to get shoes on and to follow him. We trekked for about a half mile into a secluded clearing in the woods behind our house. I tried several times to ask him where we were going at midnight, but, like a parent on a roadtrip, he told me that I'd see when we arrived. I was nervous, and a little ticked, but when we finally did reach the clearing, I noticed that we were not alone. Riley's two friends, Abigail and Seth, awaited us. The light of the moon provided more than enough light to see, but I didn't notice the large ring cut into the earth until Seth asked that Riley "take his place in the Circle." Seth had been informed that I would be coming (not that I had any idea), and began to explain that the full moon was a night of reverance in honor of the Goddess. Confusion and questions overwhelmed me, but he instructed me simply to watch. I was asked that night to never go into the finer points of the ritual, but after the Circle was "cast," Seth led Abby and Riley in a solemn prayer for guidance, perseverance, and strength. One by one, the recited, from memory, their own prayers and words of thanksgiving, in beautifully written prose. These were not ritual poems, however, they included specifics from days and weeks past; they were personal. Abigail humbly beseeched her Goddess for the safety of her brother overseas; Seth, near tears, petitioned the heavens for the health of his mother, fatally ill. Riley, ever one for simplicity, asked only, "That Roman's spirit might find rest, in his God, or another." That did it, that small statement, laid bare before the divines. Riley was a rash boy, and still is. Temperment was never one of his finer qualities, and he often spoke inconsiderately, or out of turn. Yet that night, in the presence of his gods, he cared for me. Also, I noted something quite unfamiliar to my own faith...
No Christian I'd yet encountered had been content with the eternal status of a non-Christian. We were a group eager to conver, eager to sway others to our own opinions. I wouldn't ever have requested of my God that he lead a friend to a place of peace at the doorstep of another temple. However, I observed much more compassion and understanding in Riley than in myself when he offered up a prayer to the stars for my well being, even if it should be in the House of the Lord. A change took root that night. I became less and less satisfied with God. I became more enraged at the inaction of my friends and fellow church-goers. No longer did I trust that I could sit idle while my needs were met from up on high. Then, I reached a breaking point one night in the middle of my Bible study, when the youth pastor, speaking of the Book of Revelation, said that those set apart from the Christian flock, cut off from God by mortal sin, were damned to Hell. In fury, I demanded of him to tell me what exactly set apart the unrepentant Christian from the righteous Pagan in the eyes of the Lord. As though the thought hadn't once crossed his mind, he replied, smiling, that the first was saved by the name of the Christ. To him, I replied, "That's sick," and I left.
I am well aware that the breed of Christian to which I was largely exposed was a small group, and that their interpretation of the Bible is neither well-informed, nor common. I am enlightened to the fact that they are not an acurate depection of Christianity. But it was in the shadow of their unimaginable arrogance that I saw God, and found Him an undesirable object of worship. So it came to pass that I observed my brother more often, and examined his faith with the same intensity I'd once devoted to my own. For a long time, I had nothing, and was inbetween religions. I amassed quite a large collection of facts on a great many, but was undecided on which was right for me. It was not until the tenth of January, at the beginning of this very year 2010, that I made the decision to follow my own little brother's path. I asked how to start. He told me that an initiation into Wicca takes three hundred and sixty six days, a year and a day. In that time, I was to study, and to learn, but not of his religion only. He told me to visit churches of all manor and creed, to visit synogogues and mosques, and to talk with men and women who followed every imaginable path on the road of life. He said that, if, after a year and a day of investigation and scrutiny, I still felt that his religion ought to be mine as well, he'd talk with me then. I have been at this for two hundred and thirty one days, and my opinion on religion has certainly changed. I still don't know where I shall land, but I feel that the topic is appropriate here, as I'm certainly Christian no longer.
~Roman Barth\
aka, he who refuses to write briefly
Drinking Age
Every Person has there own opinion about the drinking age in the United States. As i've gotten older my opinion has changed dramatically. When I was younger I thought the government should lessen the drinking age to 18. However, I now agree with the drinking age, do to the devastating things I've seen happen, caused from it. Someone everyday over the age of 21 dies in a car crash do to intoxication, along with underage kids as well. This tells people that even some adults don't know how to command there intake on alcohol. So why would they trust younger kids with it? Also, when you strat drinking at an early age, it can enhance the chances of becoming an alcoholic. This destroys your future and causes you to be less succesful then you have always dreamt about being. It can ruin the chances of you getting an academic or athletic scholarship for college. It is best to prevent yourself from being associated with alcohol as long as possible, until your of age and are intelligent about using it.
Ryan Wagner